Fun With Words! (7)


Smiley: Welcome to Smiley’s Fun With Words! I’m your host, Smiley the Raccoon!

Squiggle: And I’m your co-host, Squiggle von Ferret.

Smiley: Are we done yet? I’m bored.

Squiggle: We just started, and besides, no one’s ever been bored to death. The first set of words is: gullible, quash, illicit, biography, and booty.

Smiley: The gullible author agreed to write a biography on a man who performed an illicit crime of quashing the booty. And for your earlier comment, I know someone who got hit by a wild boar and the poor fellow literally was boared to death.

Squiggle: That’s not the same thing. I’m talking about the “bore” spelled B-O-R-E, you’re talking about the B-O-A-R “boar”. Anyway, the translation to that sentence is: The easily fooled author agreed to write an account of a man’s life who performed an illegal crime of squashing the plunder. Moving on, the next set of words is authorize, culprit, dissect, pathetic, and scour.

Smiley: The pathetic guard authorized the culprit of the crime to dissect the goat before he scoured the pot.

Squiggle: Smiley, that sentence makes no sense.

Smiley: Is there a law saying my sentences have to?

Squiggle: Well, I guess not. So, I guess I’ll have to translate that. The feeble guard allowed the criminal to examine the goat before he cleaned the pot.

Smiley: I don’t get it. Why would someone examine a goat?

Squiggle: I’m not the one who said it. The next set of words is expend, persevere, reminisce, fatality, and memorandum.

Smiley: The memorandum caused me to reminisce how my friend persevered on the trek while expending his energy which led to a horrible fatality.

Squiggle: The note caused me to remember how my friend proceeded on the trek while consuming his energy which led to a horrible death.

Smiley: That’s so sad! Who would come up with such a depressing sentence?

Squiggle: You did Smiley. Anyway, you over react--- it wasn’t that sad anyway.

Smiley: That’s what you think! I demand a refund!

Squiggle: A refund of what?

Smiley: I don’t know. That’s the first thing that popped into my head.

Squiggle: Okay..... The next, and last, set of words is dawdle, immerse, inflammatory, relish, and
writhe.

Smiley: Okay, I’ve got this. In order to receive the full relish of the inflammatory performance you mustn’t dawdle in the hall or you’ll miss the part where he writhes in pain after being immersed in water.

Squiggle: In order to receive the full satisfaction of the exciting performance you mustn’t dilly dally in the hall or you’ll miss the part where he squirms in pain after being plunged into water.

Smiley: That performance sounds better than this show. We should go get tickets.

Squiggle: You do realize that there is no performance like that. You made it up, remember?

Smiley: I did? I have really good ideas then.

Squiggle: Well, we should close up the show so you can go get your tickets.

Smiley: Do you know where I can get some?

Squiggle: No. Bye!

Smiley: Don’t do things that kill you! Remember who you are! Lather, rinse and repeat!